The Cooperation Sweater

When I was in preschool, there was this cream-colored wool sweater that I hated with every fiber in me.  It wasn't particularly itchy.  It wasn't ugly.  It fit...mostly.  In the Vandersluis house, this sweater was called the Cooperation Sweater because it took a team of at least two or three to get it over my head.  You'd think that this sweater was something special, like a handmade Grandma gift or Dolce & Gabbana Kids, but no. It was just some sweater from a normal children's department that my mom happened to like.  That sweater probably should have been sold as a factory second, because the only person who could get his or her head into that would have to resemble Bert of Bert 'n Ernie.

I didn't often put up a fight at that age, but when I did, you knew I thought your actions were unacceptable.  I fought the Cooperation Sweater hard each time Mom tried to shove me into it.  Clearly, even at 5, I knew that jamming yourself into something you hate because someone else thinks it's perfect for you isn't right.  And it hurts your head.  My 5-year-old self was pretty smart, and if I'd continued to think that way into my adult life, I wouldn't have continued to squeeze myself into relationships, jobs, and lifestyles that just didn't fit.

I finally get it.  Fit really is a factor when determining what's right and wrong for yourself.  Trying to make a relationship work because, you know, "a bird in the hand" and all, isn't doing you any good.  The same goes for a job that pays well, but you wish each day during your commute that something major would happen to prevent you from having to go in to the office.  If you've really let things get out of control, the entire lifestyle that you'll living could be a poor fit.

In the last semester or so (6-8 months for the non-academics out there), I've made some drastic life changes that stemmed from realizing that my lifestyle and career plan were like the Cooperation Sweater.  Like the sweater, my life looked good superficially - on my resume - but I just wasn't comfortable.  Even in the ideal work situation, where I worked at a company I love with people I love, I was still feeling like that proverbial square peg.  I started to feel trapped by my own lifestyle, which led to a minor freak out.  After that, I began to insist that my life progressed on my own terms.  Now, months later, I've never been happier.

It's scary when you realize that you need to demand the correct fit for your life.  But, believe me, it's far worse to continually work yourself into your own personal Cooperation Sweater.  The fit doesn't get better with time, so be brave and get a new sweater, boyfriend/girlfriend, job, or life.

Tinkerbell, Bonne Bell, and Other Influencers

When I was in preschool, there was a girl named Cindy who I was insanely jealous of because she was allowed to wear bright red lipstick when we played together.  As in, big girl lipstick that her mom got at Merle Norman.  Around that time, my little world began to revolve around cosmetics and how I could get as much of them as possible on me at once.

Mom gave in to my need...sort of.  I collected Bonne Bell Lip Smackers and Tinkerbell perfume, brush-on/peel-off nail polish, and banana cream lip gloss (I spent more time eating and reapplying that one than looking glossy, though) like it was my job.  You wouldn't catch me without my beauty supplies from the Bells, both Bonne and Tinker, in my sequined purse or Rainbow Brite bag.  It was the mid-to-late 80s, y'all.  Back then, things were wild and colorful, and we allowed children to wear cosmetics.

Then the 90s came along with grunge music and dark eyeliner which were both tempered by nail polish colors to match the rubber bands on my braces.  There were also a few years following that of bronzer, frosted lipstick, and roll-on glitter that we won't discuss further.

Luckily, I'm more of a Caudalie and Benefit girl these days, but my love and enthusiasm for cosmetics is still going strong.  I have a graveyard of partially-used beauty products under my sink to prove it, including every anti-aging product ever made because I got paranoid at 27 and thought I had wrinkles.  I'm so bad that I've moved through American, British, and French products and am now mesmerized by Korean skin care loot. In fact, my BFF Jess and I have decided to put our beauty obsession to good use and have launched a health and beauty conglomerate that encompasses our shared beauty interests, Jess' mad scientist chemist skills, and my health and wellness background as well.  We're off to Korea in a week or so to attend the Osong Cosmetics and Beauty Expo to start meeting with Korean beauty companies and get our foreign partnerships going for the beauty retail side of our business. More to come on all of that stuff when we're back from Korea.  


Sometimes when you need to figure out the next step in your adult life, it helps to reflect on what you loved as a kid.  Okay, so maybe not all things I loved translate, such as roller skating and setting fires; however, Tinkerbell and Bonne Bell contributed to the beginning of a life-long love, and I can't thank them enough.

(Image Credit)