My dad and I are both impulsive overachievers. To the point where it drives my mom crazy since we're always coming up with half-baked schemes for weird certifications, degrees, and qualifications. My mom just doesn't get us...she tells me that all she ever wanted was for me to be "normal" and not go about trying to do anything extra or out of the ordinary. What fun would it be if I didn't sign up for strange things on a whim? Also, being able to get Mom riled up and spittin' tacks about how ridiculous I am is a big part of the fun.
In the summer of 2009, I pulled an Elle Woods and woke up one day and said, "I think I'll get a Ph.D." I did a quick Google before work to find an English Lit doctoral program, realized that the school that I wanted to go to didn't have a program higher than Master's for that, I decided to find the closest thing, and, therefore, landed on Communication. I applied that morning to start the program on temporary non-degree status (since it was a month before I wanted to start and 7 months after the application deadline) and suddenly, I was starting a Ph.D. program before I had lunch. I'm impulsive, if nothing else. Mom thought I'd lost my mind that day. Dad was all like, "Yaaaaay! That's totally normal."
Fast forward two years. Yesterday I advanced to Ph.D. candidacy, and since Eric is out of town, my parents and I went out to celebrate at the Olive Garden (don't judge). My dad had two Xanexes before we left, so he started to let out secrets by the end of dinner. He spilled that he was thinking about getting his pilot's license, because, why not, right? Since Dad paved the way and Mom had already used up some of her trademark logic and energy, I took that opportunity to announce that I've applied to the community college to start taking French classes next semester. I'll only be writing my dissertation and teaching one class after work then, so I'm pretty free. My mom stopped mid pilot rant to cough out, "What is wrong with you?!" Of course, that only made us talk about all of the Associate's degrees we could add on to our doctor titles, which also made Mom madder. We got all the way to planning how we're going to get our pilot's licenses, boating licenses, CDLs, scuba certifications, certificates in phlebotomy, and Associates' in radiology, construction management, emergency medical services (since Dad already has a book), and welding.
You'll be glad to know that I got my acceptance letter from the community college today, so the world is my oyster. I called my mom and told her that I had earth shattering news. She's still not speaking to me, although it was tough for her not to comment on shirtless Derek Hough on Dancing with the Stars tonight. She's a woman of willpower. Someone has to be "normal," here right?
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